Clan, I am most fortunate to have my companion’s support in my endeavours. It is not always easy talking about money with a partner. Nicole has been accommodating and adaptable in finding ways for us to work together towards financial freedom.

In the beginning:

Originally, we did not begin with similar mindsets about money. Nicole was accustomed to earning to spend, and loved doing it. I’ll admit it was often thoughtful spending: she would come home with random things that she found out ‘n’ aboot that she thought I’d like or would be beneficial in some way. At least half of what she spent money on was for other people she loved and cared about.

In contrast, I have never been a spender. Until recently, I was also never really a saver nor earner neither. I pretty much despised money and wanted to ignore it. Of course, since then I took it upon myself to “become the monster [I] fear the worst, so the monster won’t overtake [me].” But, spending has always been something I have trouble doing even when it’s essential.

Consequently, we needed to keep each other happy and find compromise. I had to learn that spending absolutely nothing was the wrong way to maintain myself and my dwelling; Nicole had to curb herself to only buying things that made sense to buy and were affordable.

Those of you who have partners, families, or cohabitants that function together, will need to have everyone on similar brainwaves about financial decisions. You need to be talking about money with your partner. This can be challenging for a while. People all have their own tendencies about their money, and many people are not comfortable discussing money. I encourage you to get comfortable talking about money. The best advice for swaying another to our money habits is, as usual, “actions speak louder than words.”

Be a role model; talk about your money victories with your partner:

For example, Nicole began to see the long-term effect of money and that it can be manipulated over time when I talked about how much I saved at certain points; what freedoms certain savings were giving me; the difference between grocery item costs and why it made the bill so much bigger or smaller.

Presently, Nicole is a full-time student; she hasn’t had the opportunity to experience long-term full-time employment. Because of this, it’s difficult to grasp how saved money grows into a stout, satisfying stack over time. However, by living together, Nicole gets to second-hand experience my financial wins. For example, I talk openly with her about extra savings I find and how much those savings will add up; how it will translate to a house that much faster, an extra adventure, piece of land, or future goal over time. These discussions with Nicole illustrate opportunities created by being thoughtful with money. She is now motivated to being strategic with her money too so that she may fulfil plans for her future.

Proving that actions have an effect, Nicole now started tracking her own expenses! She has found great satisfaction in it. There are student loans and car payments that raid her monthly; however, now that she looks ahead with her expenses she is able to plan around these money-thieving goblins. Nicole’s financial habits have had a massive change: online shopping used to be a favourite pastime — easy to do with credit card fuel — yet, now she has reached a point of only buying necessities, and if she does buy something she waits for a big sale or finds the best price. Not surprisingly, Nicole prefers writing a tiny list of expenses for each month!

Now we work as a team managing our money:

Since we have both adapted to compromising to each other’s needs there have been some great success stories.

We worked together on buying a vacuum that I stubbornly didn’t want. I had anxiety about spending big money on a name-brand and didn’t see the need for clean floors (my spending money problem), but Nicole knew we really could use one. She looked for some discount vacuums that had good reviews and all the qualities she wanted in the item. The search found options much less expensive than a name brand and we chose one that we both felt comfortable with.

In the end, I’m very happy we got the vacuum! Cleaning the floor is now so much easier than sweeping with a broom. Our living space is more “liveable,” and we saved hundreds of dollars while still getting the options that were important to us. Thankfully, Nicole taught me clean floors are worth a bit of upfront cost.

Since then, we have made numerous co-purchases or free alternatives to brighten our home. These have brought us satisfaction without feeling strain. and each time we get better at finding common ground to work with. For instance, Valentine’s Day was a huge success this year full of indulgence without costing anything. Groceries have also become an ongoing fun challenge as we work together finding bounty in frugality.

There is a snowball effect where once we consciously refuse to buy something that’s purely a ‘want,’ we get this inrush of power from now having that money for a later vision. It is a bit addicting.

It’s your turn to discuss money with your partner:

In conclusion, Nicole and I have a fun time planning events and activities to get the best bang for our buck now. Why is it worth it? Because we can use that saved money for building our treasure chest, then maybe affording vacation travelling, camping trips, etc. Furthermore, once out of school, she’ll be making a lot of money without the bad habits that come with it!

Naturally, it takes some time to get into a grove, but do your best and be patient. Make sure you and your partner are talking about money management strategies together. It is so much better to be on the same page and working for the same future.